Maybe right now you're going through a hard time or just coming out of one. Did you know that this is prime time for you to grow? Christie Ruffino, shares expert tips on how to use times of transition to embrace creativity and grow in both your personal and professional life.
How do you respond when you feel like the weight of the world is pressing down HEAVILY on your shoulders and you don’t know what’s next? Leveraging Creativity within Liminal Space is a good place to start.
When life throws you a curve ball and you are paralyzed with fear because you can’t see even a glimmer of the possibility of a positive outcome. It could be that you or a loved one is struggling through a challenging medical illness or that you feel like your heart has been broken beyond repair. It could be that your job has been suddenly eliminated or that bankruptcy appears to be the only option for you to get out of your suffocating debt. Whatever the case, it is times like this that you can either succumb to the trajectory of your downward spiral and attract more darkness, or you can embrace the space you are in, tap into your creativity, and take actions that will bring you back into the light of a better day.
Regardless of the S#&?@! Storm you are in, one thing I know for certain is that there can always be an opportunity for things to get better. The light can eventually shine through onto a new day and a brighter tomorrow. It is up to you however, to choose who you want to “be” when you are in the “in between”.
In the early 20th century, a French Anthropologist developed a name for the middle stage we are in after we experience something that deeply uproots our life. The awkward and scary time when life changes and we don’t know what is coming next. We sometimes become so overcome with crippling anxiety from hanging around in this unknown dark space because we don’t know what daybreak will bring. But, it is in this ambiguous and confusing time that the most incredible things can happen if we choose to tap into our creative inner self and choose to design a better life.
I remember many years ago, after I left my stable and well-paying job at a mortgage company to pursue a more personally rewarding career, I was completely terrified. My head doubted my decision, but I had faith in my heart that the decision was right. Yet my head kept screaming “How are you going to pay your mortgage and feed your kids dummy!”
Many years later, I know that that was one of the best decisions I ever made. I was scared, YES. I had frequent and severe panic attacks, YES. I spent many sleepless nights staring at my ceiling, YES. But it was in that vulnerable and liminal space, that I was forced to be creative and figure out the best solution to my problem. The solution that turned out to be creating a thriving, women’s networking community, the Dynamic Professional Women’s Network, Inc.
If you are in a liminal space, here is my advice to you:
Discover and list out your biggest fears.
Since I feel the best solution for your problem can only be found in a place of creativity, not reactivity, you need to remove yourself from your daily environment. Go to a coffee shop or a park bench, or better yet book an overnight stay at a hotel so you can completely unplug yourself from your life routine. Then make a list of your biggest fears. Examples for me were that my bills needed to get paid, my kids needed me home after school to be with them and to take them to their activities, I had skills but my resume had no job experience other than my ex-husband’s business, etc. These were just a few of the big fears keeping me up at night.
Discover and list your most desirable outcome.
Next, take that “fear” list and pretend that the Wizard of Oz fixed EVERY ONE of those problems. Every one of them. Now, make a list of your most desirable outcome knowing that your problems are not problems anymore. I created a description of my dream job where I utilized my skills and was able to work on things I liked to do. I did not have an actual job title, but I created a job description that included; graphic design, wear stylish clothes, help and learn from other women, computer work, work flexible hours, work from home, etc.
Have faith that you will get the outcome you are supposed to get.
I wholeheartedly believe that although we may not always get what we want, God will provide us with what we need. He does not want us to be unhappy, living a life that we were not created to live. He wants us to thrive and use the gifts He blessed us with to make a bigger impact in His kingdom. But I also believe that we can’t sit back and rely on God to do all of the work. We need to take ownership of our actions and stop letting life control us. We need to get help, if needed, and we need to make the changes necessary to ensure that we don’t go back to that old place. We need to do our part.
Living in the midst of Liminal Space can be quite challenging. Mostly because we don’t know what we don’t know and our imaginations can sometimes lead us down an even darker path. Then, our bad habits can also drive us to do things we shouldn’t, in search of a quick yet temporary solution for our pain. But one thing I know for certain is that pain is sometimes the only thing that can pave the path for us to something new.
If you are in transition, and floating in the Liminal Space, trust that answers will come. You will feel better. You can change and you can find new answers. Bravely walk down the path of pain, and through the threshold of what “was” into what “is to become”. Decide to steer clear of the anxiety, shame or loneliness and choose to tap into your creative inner self and design a better life. A life that will make: you happy, God happy, your friends and family proud, and that will set a good example for others to follow.
You can do it!!!
Christie Ruffino is the proud President and Founder of the Dynamic Professional Women’s Network, Inc. Her networking experience and leadership training has provided her the expertise to create a thriving resource for women to build their businesses in a relationship based, industry exclusive, professional networking organization designed exclusively for women to generate strong referrals for each other. Christie is now dedicated to helping others cash in on their unique strengths by defining and sharing their powerful stories and building and leveraging their own networking tribe.